I wrote this for Mother’s Day because of how the leak happened just days before the holiday. As we anticipate the Supreme Court’s dismantling of Roe vs. Wade and severely limiting abortion access, I want to share it here and hope you will all read and share my abortion story.
For a pregnant person without financial means, abortion costs are already a hardship. My father threw me out of the house shortly after my high school graduation. It was 1993, and I lived in a northern Kentucky suburb of Cincinnati.
It’s peculiar timing that a few days before Mother’s Day, the draft opinion of a Supreme Court ruling that would overturn Roe v. Wade gets leaked. But perhaps that was intentional considering that the ruling would force motherhood on women who would otherwise not have chosen it.
“Last week, a Washington mom made news by getting kicked out of a restaurant for breastfeeding her infant son. Women need support, not judgement, and certainly not shame when feeding their babies. The restaurant owner made a bad situation worse when responding to the family’s online review, “Be like decent people not like animals, there are places for everything and this place is not to breastfeed your children.”
“The science supports that “breast is best,” but what we don’t talk about is that the most common deterrent from breastfeeding is lack of support.”
Read the full column below
Breastfeeding Moms Need Support to Succeed, by Bonnie Jean Feldkamp
Last week, a Washington mom made news by getting kicked out of a restaurant for breastfeeding her infant son. Women need support, not judgement, and certainly not shame when feeding their babies.
Parents are busy. New parents especially are stressed and exhausted. It takes its toll. You must understand how ridiculous it sounds to the parents when they have to answer to the authorities. They had just made the ultimate mistake, and all they could come up with is the horrific utterance, “I forgot.”
In some ways, humans have it better than other mammals when it comes to having babies.
We can control (most of the time) whether or not we want to become pregnant. If assistance and/or drugs are desired for labor and delivery, they are available to us. A newborn giraffe doesn’t have the luxury of assistance. He drops six feet from mom’s womb to the ground. Ker-Plop!
Think about water mammals like dolphins and manatees. At least a human baby doesn’t have to nurse under water. In this video we see the bubbles escape from the baby’s nose as she exhales with her gulps, but she must swim to the surface to inhale her next breath. It’s really cool to watch!
In other ways, humans definitely have it worse than other mammals.
1. Morning sickness is a pregnancy symptom exclusive to humans. This is one way we’ve been screwed by evolution. Humans have a relatively dangerous diet. It seems that food aversions women experience are usually to the most risky foods in our diet. According to a Cornell University Study “nausea and vomiting in pregnancy is beneficial by expelling such foods as meat and strong-tasting vegetables that historically and still may contain harmful toxins and microorganisms.” This symptom typically happens in the first trimester when the fetus is most vulnerable. So, though unpleasant, this is the body’s way of protecting the fetus from potentially harmful food-borne bacteria, parasites, and toxins.
2. Labor and delivery for a first-time human mother averages nine hours. For our closest primate relative labor takes two hours. The evolutionary cause is two-fold. First, because we walk erect, our pelvis has added responsibility. To walk erect our pelvis needs to remain somewhat narrow. However, to give birth we need wider hips. A woman’s pelvis is wider than a man’s which gives her a little sway in her gait, but it’s not as wide as it could be if humans still walked on all fours.
Secondly, our babies are born large yet physically inept. Most mammals are born at 3% the size of the mother. Humans, however, are 6% of their mother’s size at birth. This makes for an arduous labor.
In utero, our energy goes to brain development. Studies even show the extra cushion of fat an infant has at birth is to support the baby’s brain development. The chubby physique is to make sure the body has good fat in reserves to support further brain development after birth. Other mammals are born skinny in comparison. If humans were to have a gestation period comparable to other mammals, a woman would carry a child for 23 months in utero. Instead, a fetus is carried for as long as possible (9 months) then delivery happens just before the fetus’ head grows too large to pass through the birth canal.
Even then, 1/1000 births are delivered surgically (*via cesarean) because the baby’s head it too big. This requires our infants to depend on mom much longer that other mammals do after birth. More details found here.
*Yes, there are many other reasons a baby is delivered via cesarean but this statistic focuses on head size.